The following facts are true and are included to set the stage. As you may know, British Columbia has more than its fair share of gangs. We have Asian gangs, Russian Mafia, biker gangs as well as a plethora of other miscreants, and most, if not all are involved in the drug trade. In Abbotsford, there are a trio of brothers,       constantly in trouble with the law. This is not               petty stuff. There have been attempts on their                        lives, drive-by shootings, many arrests. Police are a constant presence, as well as unmarked patrol cars. The brothers are constantly being picked up for weapons offenses, possessing body armor and illicit drugs. All have a long history with police. There have been drive-by shootings, visits by police SWAT teams and much, much medi... 06/06/2009

I get asked a lot of questions from time to time;         I don't really know why people expect me to have all the answers,                   but I try when I can to solve people's little dilemmas. Some of my American friends have been asking me about the illegal immigration problem as well as, hurricane recovery and even alligators attacking tourists in Florida. That question was relatively easy, because, I focus on solutions. DIG A 30 FOOT MOAT THE ENTIRE LENGTH  OF THE SOUTHERN BORDER, SEND THAT DIRT TO NEW ORLEANS TO BUILD UP THE LEVIES, AND FILL THE MOAT WITH ALLIGATORS FROM FLORIDA! (Three problems solved in one fell swoop!) Someone asked me about mad cows once. Did you ever wonder how the Feds can track a single cow, born in Canada, three years ago, right to the exact stall, and ... 06/06/2009

A new University of Toronto study reveals that the old metaphor, "seeing the world through rose colored glasses",  may be a biological reality. Apparently good and bad moods affect the way our visual cortex operates and how we see. Studies show that when in a positive mood, our visual cortex takes in more information and negative moods result in tunnel vision. Good moods enhance the size of the window through which we see the world. The upside is that we see things from a more global perspective The down side is that this can lead to distraction on critical tasks that require focus, such as operating dangerous machinery...or running a country. 06/03/2009

                         A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem. The captain's parrot! Because this bird saw the show every week, he started to understand how the tricks were done. Once he understood, he would started shouting in the middle of the show. "Look, it's not the same hat!" or            "Look he's hiding the flowers under the table!" or,                        "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?" The magician was furious, but couldn't do anything about it. It was after all the captain's parrot.  Unfortunately, one night the ship sank during a storm, drowning everyone, except the magician. He managed to find a large piece of wood floating, and as fa... 06/03/2009

I'm still trying to come to terms with this one. The costs of the auto-bailout is mounting by the day. Most Canadians don't have a private retirement fund and certainly don't earn anywhere near what auto workers in Ontario make-not even close. We are being asked to fund what was originally forecast as a $7 BILLION shortfall on GM's pension plan and has now escalated to $13.5 BILLION.  At General Motors alone, this bail-out money translates to $1.4 million for every job saved! With no guarantees that the company won't go under at a later date. These are jobs in southern Ontario, (in the States, read Michigan). This has absolutely nothing to do with what is right. It does, however, have everything to do with protecting votes in Ontario. So, while the government of the day guarantees the ... 06/02/2009

 A short while ago, I wrote a blog about my 5 in 1 Canon copier that apparently is programmed to "self-destruct" after a time. I won't go into all the details here, but have linked that blog below to explain what happened. http://activerain.com/blogsview/1069593/the-self-destruct-button Giving credit where credit is due, today the courier dropped off my new copier-no charge, with apologies. 06/02/2009

 I drive one of these. Mercedes E320. Brilliant cars, except for the damn "Faulty Lamp" warning. This occurs when a bulb burns out. And the warning light obscures the odometer and the clock-it's annoying. "A" First chance, I pull into my dealer; we're on a first name basis                 as I've paid for several of their holidays with various cars                                       I've owned and that they've maintained. "B" The minute I pull into the dealership, "Murphy's Law" kicks in. The light goes out! "C" Mick, the master-mechanic fiddles with a few things               for 2 minutes and declares, all is well.   I drive off, and 4 kilometers away, the light comes on again. I repeat "A", "B" & "C" three times. Finally, I'm told, it may be some kind of sensor that needs to be re... 06/01/2009

A new sign in the local bank lobby reads: "Please note that the bank has installed a new drive-through ATM. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed". Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.    Male Procedure: 1.Drive up to cash window.   2.Put down your window.     3.Insert card into machine and enter PIN.       4.Enter cash amount and withdraw.         5.Retrieve card, cash and receipt.           6.Put window up & drive off. Female procedure: 1.Drive up to cash machine. 2.Reverse and back up to align car with the machine. 3.Set parking brake, put window down. 4.Find handbag, remove contents to locate card. 5.Tell person on cell phone you'll call them back. 6.Attempt to insert card into ATM. 7.Open door to allow easier access due to di... 05/31/2009

Ever dreamed of winning the lottery? I mean the really BIG one. What would YOU do with all that money? Your troubles are over! You can help your kids, help your family, be a  philanthropist, buy all the stuff you never had-we've all played the "WHAT IF" game. Ever wonder what happened to some of those really BIG winners? Probably the most famous case in the United States, was a guy in West Virginia who won $315 million on Power Ball. He chose the cash option and took away $114 million after taxes. (He already had a net worth of $17 million before the win). Then, something snapped! He went on a spending spree. The woman at the convenience store where he bought the ticket got a $123,000 house, a new car and $44,000 in cash. Local charities benefited to the tune of $25 million. His persona... 05/30/2009

As a Canadian looking in from the north, some observations about American politics... ...some Hollywood icons who become famous, somehow miraculously develop the need  to speak out on all things political.  Most notable would be Ronald Reagan,    movie actor who turned to politics and       basically told everyone how bad things          were in their lives, and, only he could provide the fix. Well, that was the start of "Reaganomics" and we all know how that turned out. Staying with California, lets not forget the "Austrian body-builder".        He was so popular when he was first elected, there was actually                      talk of amending the Constitution to allow him to run for President!  I think at one point, he realized that nobody wanted to watch a "pruney old muscle-man" ... 05/30/2009

 Jaring Timmerman, Canadian swimmer, just broke the world's record for the 100 meter backstroke with a time of 3 minutes, 51.59 seconds. The amazing part of this feat is that Jaring is 100 years old!  At last month's Masters swim meet in Manitoba, he broke records in the 50 and 100 meter freestyle and the 50 meter backstroke. His wife encouraged him to do this, and to date has accumulated 170 medals. He credits his success to GEDS, an acronym he invented for: Genes, Exercise, Diet and Spirit. Looking at the guy's picture, he doesn't look older than 70 or 75. What an inspiration to all of us! 05/27/2009

Tax Freedom Day arrives on June 14. (Big Whoop!) That is the day when Canadians start working for themselves. In other words, we have finally finished paying for all the taxes imposed upon us by the various levels of government. Five and a half months of income! At 45% of our income, we are the highest taxed of any G-7 nation!   A little history. Personal income tax was brought into being in 1917 as a TEMPORARY measure to fund the war. Implemented by Thomas White, (pictured), he hoped  it would last, at best, perhaps two or three years. I pretty sure in all the subsequent governments, spanning almost a hundred years, there was not one cattleman among them, but not one politician had the slightest problem recognizing a  cash cow when they saw one. Here's a smattering of a few of OUR taxe... 05/27/2009

(Letter to the Workman's Compensation Board) Dear Sir, I am writing in response to your request for additional information. In block #3 of the accident reporting form, I put "Trying to do the job alone", as the cause of my accident. You said in your recent letter that I should explain more fully, and I trust the following details will be sufficient.  I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had about 500 pounds of brick left over. Rather than carry them down by hand, I decided to lower them to the ground in a barrel using a pulley, which fortunately was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung... 05/26/2009

Tech rep: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I'm within my warranty period. How do I go about getting it fixed?" Tech rep: "I'm sorry, did you say cup holder?" Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer". Tech rep: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotion, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have a trademark on it?" Caller: "It came with the computer. I don't know anything about a promotion. It just has '4X' on it" At this point the tech rep had to mute the phone because he couldn't stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off at the drive. (Another candidate for the Darwin awards!) 05/26/2009

 Angelo Petrucci at 37 is          perhaps the youngest master tailor in the world. Italian label "Brioni"                           hand-crafts the finest suits money can buy. His client list reads like a "who's who". Pierce Brosman, Daniel Craig, Donald Trump, Kofi Annan, Prince Andrew and Gerhard Schroeder are all clients, as well as several heads of state.  The "master" doesn't come cheap. "Off-the-rack", start at $5,000, but, the finest quality can set you back $52,000! One suit can take 30,000 hand stitches, and an army of tailors will spend 35 hours on one suit. One Saudi sheik ordered 400 suits at one visit! At press time, there was no indication that WalMart was carrying the Brioni line yet. 05/25/2009

A couple of buddies went duck hunting last winter in Alberta. At that time of the year, the lakes of course are frozen over. But they want to make some kind of landing area for the ducks and a place to float their decoys. So, they drive out to the middle of the lake, in their brand new Lincoln Navigator and start to bore holes in the ice. But this proves to be too tedious. One of them has bright idea. He has dynamite in the truck from a construction job he's on...Now, these guys have thought this out a bit. They don't want to risk lighting the fuse and running and slipping on the ice, so they decide to light the fuse and throw it as far as they can.  They set a 40 second fuse, lit it and threw the stick about 75 feet. Did I mention they had their dog with them? It's a bird dog-a retriev... 05/25/2009

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the two beers. A professor stood in front of his Philosophy 201 class                 and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the sudents if the jar was full. They agreed it was! The professor then poured a box of small pebbles into           the jar and shook the jar slightly. The pebbles                    filled the spaces between the golf balls.                                 Again he asked the students if the                                         jar was full. They agreed it was. Next, the professor poured a box of sand into the... 05/25/2009

An economics professor said he had never failed              a single student, but had on one occasion,                            failed an entire class. That class had insisted that socialism worked, and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich-a great equalizer. The professor said, "O.K., we will have an experiment in this class on socialism". All grades will be averaged and everyone receives the same grade. No one will fail; no one will get an "A". After the first test was graded, everyone got a "B". The students who studied hard were upset, and, the students who studied little, were pleased. But, as the second test rolled around, the students who study little, studied even less and those who studied hard, decided they wanted a free ride too! Everyone in the class got a "D... 05/24/2009

I work in a home office. I choose to, because I'm not particularly fond of office politics or standing around the water cooler or subjecting myself  to every disease on the planet. And, I'm cheap! I save a lot of money working from home, AND, I'm disciplined, so it isn't a problem. Besides, I have a nice office, well equiped, and, I like working alone. Lately though. the ice cream guy is driving me crazy!      You know the ones; they drive by at 1 MPH,                 blaring out the theme song from the                        movie, "The Sting!" By the time he                             gets from the start of the block                                    to the end of my streeet, I've                                          listened to the tune 70 times! I eat dinner, go to bed, and wa... 05/24/2009

In a previous blog, I predicted China would soon be on line with a new car. Well, it's here!   This is not a toy or a concept car! This is a highly aerodynamic real car, and it's ready to be launched in 2010. Wait 'till you hear the price. Concept to production-3 years. Company is headquartered in Germany. Although the car is Chinese, those are Volkswagon insignia on the car. (You know the Germans make good stuff!)     Interested? Here are the specs on this thing. It will cruise at 100-120 Km/hour, with an unbelievable 258 miles per gallon! Gas tank holds 1.7 gallons and has a travel distance of 404 miles on one tank of gas. Price? $600 U.S (Might make a neat little commuter car for around town.) 05/24/2009