Yes & it can be very hurtful. I know this sounds sexist but somehow men are perceived as 'needing the business' more than women for some reason. 'He' really needed the business, like you didn't or don't?

   It happens.  

    Most recent for me was the son of a good friend.  He and his wife bought straight from a listing agent (saw her For Sale sign on a Sunday afternoon).  

     Crummy house, crummy neighborhood, they paid full price with no seller concessions.  The LA talked them out of a home inspection; they found major issues after moving in.  THEN they come to me asking for help.  "Sorry, you have already closed on it.  There is nothing I can do.  Here are the names of some good attorneys...".

A family member ignored my referral and I swear to Buddha, he found the worst listing broker on the western seaboard . . . all the way down to obese woman with iPad in mirror photos! Between the willingness to give away the farm and the loss of referral income which would have gone toward repairs/deferred maintenance . . . that decision probably cost the family upper 5 figures. Tragic stupidity.

Sometimes I suggest that they work with someone else.

No, but if they did, I would not really be concerned about it.  I am not sure I would use a close friend or family member for a real estate transaction if I were not in real estate due to a desire for complete privacy and because I would not want business to interfere with our relationship. 

I once had a transaction involving someone with whom I worked very closely in a previous life;  boy, were my eyes opened when I saw the filthy condition of her house, the way she treated people and other things.  I never could look at her ever again in the same way and I always wished I hadn't found out certain things about her.  Ignorance can be bliss. 

they wouldn't dare.... but when they DO call me, I NEVER WORK WITH FAMILY OR CLOSE FRIENDS....NEVER.... I refer them to someone I trust...

I was very happy when an aunt chose to work with another agent to sell her overpriced, cluttered house which took forever. (I am sure that she drove her agent crazy.)

Sure, plenty of times. 

One time I worked with a guy who lived with his sister, who was a real estate agent.  She did not know he was buying a house with us.  Strange.

Eve

No... I have no family locally, so they have to do their buying and selling with someone other than me... but they do call for recommendations of with whom to work at their end.

No

Nope _ I at least get all the referrals for them

Yes. I think it happens to the best of us, but also everyone knows several real estate agents, so you may not always be the closest one to them. We do work with a lot of our friends though. -Kasey

Yes, but it didn't work out.

Yes, of course!  Bear in mind that family and friends may not want you to know what assets they have (or do not have) and how they deal with their transactions.  Lots of dark corners there...  Only trust and honesty will win them over.

yes

Of course, you were expecting loyalty?

Yes.  Stuff happens.   

No

More than 65% of agents have to deal with it. Reasons are many: Do not want to share personal info., bank savings.  Lack of confidence that realative or friend will be unfriend if messed it up.  Many rather use stranger as it is just business.

When I was a full-time DJ and new in Real Estate, my business partner did that. He forgot I was in real estate...my fault for assuming.

There have been a few instances where friends or acquaintances have worked with a realtor other than me.  Sometimes people already have a relationship with a realtor or they don't feel comfortable revealing private information to someone they know. People have their preferences and that's okay.

What's NOT okay is when people ask you a million questions and run you around and then use someone else.  That's shady and totally disrespectful.  

"did" real estate?

Absolutely.  I will not work with family. Many of my friends know many agents ... and some are loyal to the agent they had before we met.  I do not expect all of my "friends" to do business with me.  

Oh yes of course this happens and for many reasons...it can be an owee

Yes but they are not local so all I could have done would have been referrals

That's typical Karen... Except for mom.... 

Karen Jones Lewis, MBA, Realtor Unfortunately I have missed a lot of referrals from out of town relatives who know and have been reminded I am in real estate. Some have sold and purchased more than one property.

No - I would look at it as their loss, though, Karen! 

When they phone you to ask questions about the transaction - let them know that you legally can't answer them!  Again, their loss!

NO

Yes they have but they did not grasp the concept as to how real estate works.  They think we get paid no matter how it goes.  

You can advise some and they will never get it.

Yes. You have to earn the business.

Yes very recently, and even worse when it was not going wel they called me for emergency advice. I am writing about it this week

I think this happens to everyone at some point. I have tenants that have rented from me for years and were very happy with my service, but then they buy through another agent because they forgot that I could help them. In a small community like mine it seems everyone knows a couple REALTORS so it's not surprising when they choose someone else.

Yes and they did not even give us the opportunity to discuss their needs. Bye bye!

No for the family. Yes for friends who did not think it through.

Karen Jones Lewis, MBA, Realtor - question is - did they remain friends?

yes all the time...only bothers me when they ask for advice and then go somewhere else.

Oh course we have all been hurt that way. I don't let it get me down.

everyone knows another Realtor

I have clients that have a cousin that does RE in Denver, but always use me.   Sometimes they want to keep it out of the "family".

Karen, I also had a neighbor sign with someone else and they would have dinner once a month with us.

Family -no. friends-yes