Spirit Messingham, Third Generation Full-Time Realtor® 520 471-6900 (Tierra Antigua Realty)

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Mark Don McInnes, Sandpoint-Idaho
Sandpoint Realty LLC - Sandpoint, ID
North Idaho Real Estate - 208-255.6227

I do tend to take things personal and always have.  Not just rejection.  Rude, bossy, sarcastic.  Real Estate has made me calm my inner self.  Actually more than I am happy with.  Some people need be told where to go, no matter what profession you are in.  Just my opinion of course.  Mark

Nov 06, 2015 11:04 AM
Tammy Lankford,
Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668 - Eatonton, GA
Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville

I've never taken it personally.  So it just rolls off me like water on a ducks back.

Nov 06, 2015 11:11 AM
Marco Giancola
Beachfront Realty - Miami Beach, FL
Realtor (305)608-1922, Miami Beach Florida

Rejection is part of the game you can't win them all BUT the more mud you throw at the wall the greater the chance some will stick! 

Nov 06, 2015 06:31 PM
Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA

If it is No with absolutely no way to fix it, I just forget about it immediately and focus on the next task. What is the point to waste time and be upset? You can not please all or give 100% satisfaction as many in our profession promise:) 

Nov 06, 2015 04:35 PM
Debbie Reynolds, C21 Platinum Properties
Platinum Properties- (931)771-9070 - Clarksville, TN
The Dedicated Clarksville TN Realtor-(931)320-6730

I get a fair amount of rejection and try to leave it on a positive note. You never know if the situation may change and an opportunity may open in the future.

Nov 06, 2015 08:37 AM
Susan Emo
Sotheby's International Realty Canada - Brokerage - Kingston, ON
Kingston and the 1000 Islands Area

As long as they don't draw blood, I'm good!   We're not always going to be a good fit but I've found, when you work by referral, the rejections become fewer and further between.  That's how I dealt with it years ago and now it is pretty rare.

Nov 06, 2015 08:34 AM
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Realtor

I don't handle it well and believe that the day I do, I am in trouble. It's the nature of our business and I expect it, but I still don't like it. That doesn't mean I'm rude about it, however. Than it's on to the next one..

Nov 06, 2015 09:32 PM
James Dray
Fathom Realty - Bentonville, AR

Every no is just one step closer to a yes.  When I go fishing I don't catch them all but I do catch some.  

Nov 06, 2015 08:44 PM
Gail Gladstone
Gladstone Group & Long Island Business Brokerage - Huntington, NY
Brokering Success

You are NOT being personally rejected. I cut my teeth on FSBOs.

There's two things that I pack in my daily case as I work, number one is handling objections, which is all rejection is, and number two, my favorite word, NEXT!

Nov 06, 2015 08:42 PM
Wayne Zuhl
Remax First Realty II - Cranford, NJ
The Last Name You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

If you get a "Yes" once in 10 tries, every "No" is one step closer!

Nov 06, 2015 08:23 PM
John McCormack, CRS
Albuquerque Homes Realty - Albuquerque, NM
Honesty, Integrity, Results, Experienced. HIRE Me!

I'll admit it, I do tend to take rejection personally.  Debbie's a great cheerleader and quickly pulls me out of my funk. 

Nov 06, 2015 06:38 PM
Joe Petrowsky
Mortgage Consultant, Right Trac Financial Group, Inc. NMLS # 2709 - Manchester, CT
Your Mortgage Consultant for Life

Good morning Spirit. When someone says no to me, I ask them the following, "What are you saying NO to?" Once I can understand the answer to that question, I may have a shot for a Yes. I'm never willing to take it personally.

Nov 06, 2015 06:19 PM
TeamCHI - Complete Home Inspections, Inc.
Complete Home Inspections, Inc. - Brentwood, TN
Home Inspectons - Nashville, TN area - 615.661.029

 Good Saturday morning Spirit. It is hard to take rejection. It does injure our spirit. However, I have to look at it that there is another opportunity even much better than that one.

Nov 06, 2015 05:28 PM
Sybil Campbell
Fernandina Beach, FL
Referral Agent Amelia Island Florida

I try not to take it personally.  There are many reasons a person works with a REALTOR.

Nov 06, 2015 02:57 PM
Blanca Barajas
Winter Group - Las Vegas, NV

Learn from it an move on, I dont let it get to me.

Nov 06, 2015 02:13 PM
Troy Erickson AZ Realtor (602) 295-6807
HomeSmart - Chandler, AZ
Your Chandler, Ahwatukee, and East Valley Realtor

Spirit - How I handle rejection is to find the next client as fast as possible. For every client I lose, I work that much harder to replace them with someone else.

I'm not a big show and dance guy either. I know I am good at what I do, but I don't have to show it off. 

Nov 06, 2015 01:41 PM
Sandra Graves
Keller Williams Realty - Folsom, CA

I only want to work with people who want to work with me, so I'm okay with it. If they reject you, chances are you would've rejected them if they were the agent and you were the client. It all works out in the end.

Nov 06, 2015 01:34 PM
Larry Johnston
Broker, Friends & Neighbors Real Estate and Elkhart County Subdivisions, LLC - Elkhart, IN
Broker,Friends & Neighbors Real Estate, Elkhart,IN

Not everyone likes everyone else. Personalities are all over the place.  If I'm rejected for whatever reason, we have to just get over it and focus on new things.

Nov 06, 2015 09:47 AM
Kathleen Luiten
Resort and Second-Home Specialist - Princeville, HI
Kauai Luxury Ocean Home Sales

Like you I keep it in perspective, Spirit. And if it isn't a good fit for them it really isn't a good fit for me so I am fine with it.

Nov 06, 2015 08:45 AM
Katina Hargrove 352-551-0308
Stake Your Land Realty, Inc. - Eustis, FL
Broker/Owner, GRI,SFR, REALTOR®

Rejections are probably doors that God does not wants me to enter and I simply accept them and move on to the next.

Nov 07, 2015 09:24 PM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Let the hurt and the pain have its way. In time, a second skin and savvy will visit elevating you above it all like water running off a ducks back. Go toward the rejection to learn the process.

Nov 07, 2015 07:23 AM
Cassandra Vickers
RE/MAX Pioneers - Cypress, TX

I don't take rejection personally, but I do try to get down to the reason for the no. Is it a no for right now but you will be ready in the near future? Is it a no because you don't understand the benefits I can provide for you? Is it a no because your thinking about using your 4th cousin who sells maybe 1 house every 3 years but promises to give you a rebate on the commission? Is it a no because you don't understand the process? I would rather have rejection than have someone not be so truthful!

Nov 07, 2015 05:14 AM
Annette Lawrence , Palm Harbor, FL 727-420-4041
ReMax Realtec Group - Palm Harbor, FL
Making FLORIDA Real Estate EZ

Tweedle Dee are putting up wood for the winter. Around them lie axes, wedges and a big cross buck to help the get the job done. Lying at his feet are two 36 inch Stihl chain saws, clearly the key tool for cutting the logs. With one Spruce on the sawbucks, Tweedle Dee picks up th Stihl and begins jawing it back and forth across the bark, beneath the quiet of the forest canopy. 

I put my hand on Tweedle Dees shoulder and remove the Stihl from his hands. Pulling the cord the engine jumps to life. I demonstrate how to cut the log using the rotating chain running the edge of the blade. Shutting off the engine, the saw is returned.

Tweedle Dee resumes jawing the blade back and forth across the bark beneath the quite of the forest canopy.

Tweeedle Dee did not reject me. The solution I presented did not appear beneficial to him. I don't take it personally. I do wish folks would choose the right solution, but that, I accept, is beyond my control.

Nov 07, 2015 01:03 AM
Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

There is always rejection somewhere, and the hardest is when I see one of my past clients list their home with another agent, and they did not call me.   It takes a day or so to get over that! 

Nov 06, 2015 10:27 PM
Gita Bantwal
RE/MAX Centre Realtors - Warwick, PA
REALTOR,ABR,CRS,SRES,GRI - Bucks County & Philadel

I do not cold call so I do not have to deal with rejections.

Nov 06, 2015 08:28 PM
Noah Seidenberg
Coldwell Banker - Evanston, IL
Chicagoland and Suburbs (800) 858-7917

It is not easy and there truly are ups and downs Spirit. This is a rough part of sales, even more so with Real Estate.

Nov 06, 2015 01:47 PM
Mike Rock
Complete Design - Granite Bay, CA
Granite Bay Luxury New Construction...For Less

there is ALWAYS something to be learned use each experience to learn about yourself and or humanity

Nov 06, 2015 01:27 PM
Jill Murty, Realtor - Orange County, CA
Movoto - Laguna Niguel, CA

No one can be everyone's flavor and that's okay.  

I can do without the time waster user types.  I can usually spot them pretty quickly, but one that was a referral slipped through.

I don't dwell on things like that.  I assess to see what I can learn and then keep moving ahead. 

Nov 06, 2015 12:10 PM
Stefan Winter
Real Estate in IL & NV | Owner of Real Estate Web Tech | Daily Vlogger - Las Vegas, NV
Owner - Winter Group & Real Estate Web Tech

I handle it very well, as an entrepreneur I took the every no gets you closer to the next yes. That keeps me going.

Nov 06, 2015 10:53 AM
Evelyn Johnston
Friends & Neighbors Real Estate - Elkhart, IN
The People You Know, Like and Trust!

The everyday rejection I can handle.  It's when people go out of their way to try and make you feel less than who you know you are.

Nov 06, 2015 10:21 AM
Women of Westchester Working Together
Women of Westchester Working Together - West Harrison, NY
Women helping Women get ahead

That's a really good analogy and I will need to remember that more often.

Nov 06, 2015 09:27 AM
Candice A. Donofrio
Next Wave RE Investments LLC Bullhead City AZ Commercial RE Broker - Fort Mohave, AZ
928-201-4BHC (4242) call/text

Rejection Is Protection!

Nov 06, 2015 08:58 AM
Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Spirit Messingham I remember those days when I used to take it personally! I would really be disappointed and would go 'under cover' for few days before getting back to normal.

I'd always question myself 'Am I so bad'? Specially when the work with someone who I thought were half as good as I was!(yep,...)

Not any more! Now I feel, it's their loss if they decide to work with someone else.

Nov 07, 2015 12:29 PM
Sharon Altier
Coldwell Banker Realty - Elmhurst, IL
Luxury Property Specialist, CSC, SFR

No different that how it is handled in other aspects of my life.  We grow up with various forms of rejection, so this should not be any big deal.  If there is any conflict, it does not happen, so move on to the next.  If two personalities clash, it is not meant to be.  I don't get offended by it.  Move on to the next...clients always do!  If all else fails, exercise!  Blow off the steam!

Nov 07, 2015 07:06 AM
Evelyn M Epperson
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Johns Creek, GA
A Tradition Of [Excellence, Trust & Service]

I am good with rejection because sometimes personalities clash.

Nov 07, 2015 07:05 AM
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

I can handle rejection just fine.  Though, I have issues when people lie and go behind my back rather than just telling me they don't want to use my services.

Nov 07, 2015 04:13 AM
David Gibson CNE, 719-304-4684 ~ Colorado Springs Relocation
Colorado Real Estate Advisers LLC - Colorado Springs, CO
Relocation, Luxury & Lifestyle residential

If the rejection was because of something different I could have done I try to learn from it. Otherwise, “it is what it is” and I move on.

Nov 07, 2015 04:10 AM
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Happily Retired - Franklin, MA
Previously Affiliated with The Todaro Team

I hate to be rejected....I fight for the business right to the end.... until the ink is on the paper and it's bone dry....

Nov 07, 2015 03:21 AM
Ron and Alexandra Seigel
Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA
Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy


It is not about you, it is about not being a match.  A

Nov 07, 2015 03:18 AM
Kevin J. May
Florida Supreme Realty - Hobe Sound, FL
Serving the Treasure & Paradise Coasts of Florida

Once you understand that you're interrupting the recipient's routine it's much easier to empathize and accept the rejection. You had better provide an alternative or something of value within the first 10 seconds. Otherwise it's jab, jab then uppercut for you then you're out! Expect it then repeat. 

Nov 07, 2015 01:47 AM
Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service / Woodland Real Estate, KW Diversified - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9671

Like most people, I do not enjoy rejection, but it helps to keep a full schedule and the next "yes" will make you forget about that rejection.

Nov 07, 2015 01:35 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH Real Estate - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

OK, have to admit that Ic ould use a little help in the rejection area.  Even though I don't handle it really badly, I sometime allow myself to go into a funk for at least a short time after a reject.  Still, it's a part of this business.

Nov 07, 2015 01:23 AM
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Uh-oh, did someone say I didn't handle rejection?  Yikes!  Who was it?   What did they say?   

Nov 07, 2015 12:32 AM
Michael Setunsky
Woodbridge, VA
Your Commercial Real Estate Link to Northern VA

Spirit Messingham In this business you have to keep a positive attitude when it comes to rejection. Real estate guru Tom Hopkins always said every 'No' will eventually lead to a 'Yes'. Rejection will keep you grounded.

Nov 06, 2015 10:51 PM
Tony and Suzanne Marriott, Associate Brokers
Serving the Greater Phoenix and Scottsdale Metropolitan Area - Scottsdale, AZ
Haven Express @ Keller Williams Arizona Realty

I learned long ago to separate emotion from business.  Unfortunately, some agents on the other side of transactions haven't, and my "unruffled" demeanor sometimes seems to get them "more emotional".  Not sure why...

Nov 06, 2015 10:36 PM
Raymond E. Camp
Ontario, NY
Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Greater Rochester

Every no is a missed opportunity and a learning lesson.

Nov 06, 2015 10:27 PM
Richard Weeks
Dallas, TX
REALTOR®, Broker

If they don't like me, I probably did not like them first.  Just walk on.

Nov 06, 2015 09:56 PM
Sandy Padula & Norm Padula, JD, GRI
HomeSmart Realty West & Florida Realty Investments - , CA
Presence, Persistence & Perseverance

I easily 'disconnect' emotions. This is sales and it has never changed in all of humanity.

Nov 06, 2015 09:50 PM
Valeria Mola
SIB Realty - Miami, Sunny Isles Beach - Sunny Isles Beach, FL
305-607-0709 SIB Realty Condos for Sale and Rent

Great question and answers.

Nov 02, 2019 03:57 PM
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

No is just one step closer to a yes, I find that it tells me we are getting closer... and the key if the No is legitimate I have no problems with it...on the other hand if it is just an excuse then I have a problem with it, Endre

Nov 12, 2015 03:13 PM
Lise Howe
Keller Williams Capital Properties - Washington, DC
Assoc. Broker in DC, MD, VA and attorney in DC

 there are days when I need to go home and put my feet up and have a glass of wine, but tomorrow always comes and I believe that every day is a new opportunity. (Except when I believe that bad things come in 3's!) 

Nov 10, 2015 10:41 PM
Nancy Robinson Ranked #6 in MI
Century 21 Town and Country - Royal Oak, MI
#11 Century21 Realtor in the US, #16 in the World

Every morning I get up and bathe myself in duck feathers so the rejection that becomes part of the life of a full time Realtor rolls right off my back.   

Nov 10, 2015 10:34 AM
Karen Fiddler, Broker/Owner
Karen Parsons-Fiddler, Broker 949-510-2395 - Mission Viejo, CA
Orange County & Lake Arrowhead, CA (949)510-2395

I really don't care to be honest. It just doesn't matter to me. 

Nov 09, 2015 08:59 AM
Debra Peters
Referral Realty - Manorville, NY
NY Real Estate Salesperson

I attempt to have Tammy Lankford 's attitude. For the most part, I say NEXT.

Although I must admit, if I am having a rough day, it's no always that easy to handle repeat rejection. Tomorrow is another day.

Nov 09, 2015 06:29 AM
Les & Sarah Oswald
Realty One Group - Eastvale, CA
Broker, Realtor and Investor

It still hurts. But rejection is just part of the process. As long as I remember that I gave 100% and it is nothing personal. 

Nov 08, 2015 07:25 AM
Rob Thomas
Prestige Homes of The Tri Cities, Inc. CALL....423-341-6954 - Bristol, TN
Bristol TN-VA & Tri Cities Agent, ABR, GRI, e-Pro

You just have to get use to it over the years and know that the next one will be a positive one! It's hard at first to handle ....you just can't take it personally ....some I look back on and am glad they rejected me!

Great question!

Nov 08, 2015 06:03 AM